Photo: Luke Simpson

In This Issue

Am I the only one who finds it a tad ironic that we're all devoted to the most narcissistic of sports, yet we constantly focus on what everyone else is doing -- what brands they're wearing, what waves they're catching, and most of all, what boards they're riding...? 

Why do we even give a damn? Surfing doesn't cure cancer, or even a hangnail. It doesn't feed a homeless dog or teach American history to kids or work overtime to buy an anniversary present. All it does is make us feel good. Us. You and I. Our waves. Our rides. Our adventures. Our glory. But on any given day, we're really quick to assess, and subsequently, judge every waverider who glides into our periphery. And it usually starts with the watercraft underneath them: Longboard or shortboard. Bodyboard or tow board. Epoxy or polyester. Fish or gun. Glass-ons or fin systems. Airbrush or all-white... The only way we feel committed to our own equipment choices is by belittling others'. 

To say that I was less than thrilled to tackle a "longboard issue" would be a massive understatement. In fact, I nearly gave myself laryngitis reciting in the bathroom mirror excuses why it needed to be done. It all felt like one incredible lie. The truth is, I could care less about longboards and even less about who's riding them. The reason? Because I don't. At least not out of choice. 

Try to understand this is my personal feeling as a self-serving, self-involved surfer, not as the editor of this mag. In fact, I lobbied for the theme louder than anyone here, for obvious reasons. For one, we hadn't done anything like this in seven years. Secondly, longboards represented an exponentially large proportion of the total surfboards shaped in 2006 (an estimated 55-percent, compared to 27-percent fishes/ alternative shapes and 18-percent shortboards). But I myself am not staying up until three in the morning to watch a live World Longboard Tour webcast from halfway around the world like I would a WCT event. I'm not buying longboard videos and rewinding Wingnut's parts to analyze his cross-stepping technique. As a matter of fact -- and I'm a bit ashamed to admit it -- I don't even have a longboard in my quiver at the moment. 

From a strictly athletic perspective, they bore me. They provide far less cardiovascular exercise than riding a shortboard, and probably even a bodyboard, for that matter. I'd honestly rather take a high-tide whomping in the shorebreak to get just a half-second tube perspective, instead of waiting outside for a cheeseburger of a ride that's so predictable and inconsequential, I could probably do my taxes while gliding down the line. Then again, I'm not skilled enough to airdrop 90-degrees straight down into a Hatteras dredger, double-pump through a flume of spit, and lay that big-finned monster on a rail like Jesse Fernandez can. In other words, a good surfer is a good surfer, no matter what he's riding. 

Longboards also inspire greed more than any other equipment. Not one person out there can say that haven't gotten the shit end of that stick: splitting a nice, glassy peak with your buddy all morning long before some jerk with a 10'6" and a twisted sense of entitlement crashes the party and paddles right past you both to unscrupulously hoard the lot. But now that I think about it, it's only wave hogs who complain about other dudes being wave hogs. Those of us who are happy enough to get a few scraps, well... you never see us breaking down these dicks into groups. In other words, an asshole is an asshole, no matter who he's snaking.  

Finally, and this is the worst thing about longboards, they allow non-skilled, non-committed, non-addicted Average Joes out there to access our mysterious, sublime world. Which is exactly why it was imperative to dedicate this issue to these surfcraft. Because chances are the first wave you've ever ridden and the last wave you will ever ride, will be on a longboard. Whenever you choose to introduce your kid or your sweetheart to waveriding, you'll probably do it on a longboard. If you're ever too sick or too injured to rip, a longboard will make your unfortunate situation seem far less bleak. And god forbid you're ever crippled like Matt Fraiser, the surfer with the prosthetic leg on Page 104, but you'll still be able to wax up, paddle out, stand tall, and ride away... on a longboard. 

Put simply, they're the Everyman's shape. And sooner or later, you won't be that same narcissist defined by your own self-imposed, bullshit politics. Sooner or later, you will be that Everyman. So will I. And that's why once this issue hits the shops, I'm going shopping for a log. While I probably won't take it on my next surf trip, or even out front during the next decent swell for that matter, I will ride one at some point. Not because of the timeless validity of longboards themselves, but because of what they offer us: Eternal salvation right here on Earth. 

However, no matter what I write or what photos we print, it's unlikely we'll change anyone's existing attitude about the subject. I'd like to hope that we're all on our way to a new enlightenment, if we could stop being such snobs. But I know this for sure: When any of my close friends ever grab the nearest log and head out the door, they never say, "I'm going longboarding." 

They always say the same thing: "I'm going surfing."  

By Matt Pruett